Well, Where to report it now????? (Link)
Diwali (or Deepavali) is the third day of the Diwali festival.
"Diwali", the festival of lights, illuminates the darkness of the New Year's moon, and strengthens our close friendships and knowledge, with a self-realization!"
Diwali is celebrated on a nation-wide scale on Amavasya - the 15th day of the dark fortnight of the Hindu month of Ashwin, (October/November) every year. It symbolizes that age-old culture of India which teaches to vanquish ignorance that subdues humanity and to drive away darkness that engulfs the light of knowledge. Diwali, the festival of lights even to-day in this modern world projects the rich and glorious past of India.
Every year on the dark nights of Diwali the sound of firecrackers announces the celebration of the favorite festival of Indians. Homes are decorated, sweets are distributed by everyone and thousands of lamps are lit to create a world of fantasy. Of all the festivals celebrated in India, Diwali is by far the most glamorous and important. Enthusiastically enjoyed by people of every religion, its magical and radiant touch creates an atmosphere of joy and festivity.
The ancient story of how Diwali evolved into such a widely celebrated festival is different in various regions and states of India. In the north, particularly in Uttar Pradesh, Punjab, Haryana, Bihar and the surrounding areas, Diwali is the day when King Rama's coronation was celebrated in Ayodhya after his epic war with Ravana, the demon king of Lanka. By order of the royal families of Ayodhya and Mithila, the kingdom of which Sita was princess, the cities and far-flung boundaries of these kingdoms were lit up with rows of lamps, glittering on dark nights to welcome home the divine king Rama and his queen Sita after 14 years of exile, ending with an across-the-seas war in which the whole of the kingdom of Lanka was destroyed.
On the day of Diwali festival, doorways are hung with torans of mango leaves and marigolds. Rangolis are drawn with different colored powders to welcome guests. The traditional motifs are often linked with auspicious symbols of good luck. Oil diyas are arranged in and around the house. Because of these flickering lamps, the festival has acquired its name : Dipawali or Diwali meaning 'a rows of lamps'. On this day, people buy something for the house or some jewelry for the women of the house. It is auspicious to be buy something metallic, such as silver.
Whatever may be the fables and legends behind the celebrations of Diwali, all people exchange sweets, wear new clothes and buy jewelry at this festive time. Card parties are held in many homes. Diwali has become commercialized as the biggest annual consumer spree because every family shops for sweets, gifts and fireworks. However, in all this frenzy of shopping and eating, the steady, burning lamp is a constant symbol of an illuminated mind.
The festival of Diwali is not only significant to Hindus, but, has importance in Jainism, Buddhism, and Sikhism. For Hindus, it is associated with the return of Lord Rama to Ayodhya, after his 14 years of exile and victory over the demon Ravana.
On that day, he was welcomed to the kingdom to Ayodhya with rows of Deep, lightened throughout the kingdom.
Thus, there is a tradition of lighting oil lamps that symbolize the victory of good over evil and freedom from spiritual darkness.
Hindus, also make preparations to welcome goddess Lakshmi by drawing rangoli, and footsteps (Paduka) On the entrance that would allure goddess Laksmi to visit one’s home and bring prosperity along with her.
"Diwali", the festival of lights, illuminates the darkness of the New Year's moon, and strengthens our close friendships and knowledge, with a self-realization!"
Diwali is celebrated on a nation-wide scale on Amavasya - the 15th day of the dark fortnight of the Hindu month of Ashwin, (October/November) every year. It symbolizes that age-old culture of India which teaches to vanquish ignorance that subdues humanity and to drive away darkness that engulfs the light of knowledge. Diwali, the festival of lights even to-day in this modern world projects the rich and glorious past of India.
Every year on the dark nights of Diwali the sound of firecrackers announces the celebration of the favorite festival of Indians. Homes are decorated, sweets are distributed by everyone and thousands of lamps are lit to create a world of fantasy. Of all the festivals celebrated in India, Diwali is by far the most glamorous and important. Enthusiastically enjoyed by people of every religion, its magical and radiant touch creates an atmosphere of joy and festivity.
The ancient story of how Diwali evolved into such a widely celebrated festival is different in various regions and states of India. In the north, particularly in Uttar Pradesh, Punjab, Haryana, Bihar and the surrounding areas, Diwali is the day when King Rama's coronation was celebrated in Ayodhya after his epic war with Ravana, the demon king of Lanka. By order of the royal families of Ayodhya and Mithila, the kingdom of which Sita was princess, the cities and far-flung boundaries of these kingdoms were lit up with rows of lamps, glittering on dark nights to welcome home the divine king Rama and his queen Sita after 14 years of exile, ending with an across-the-seas war in which the whole of the kingdom of Lanka was destroyed.
On the day of Diwali festival, doorways are hung with torans of mango leaves and marigolds. Rangolis are drawn with different colored powders to welcome guests. The traditional motifs are often linked with auspicious symbols of good luck. Oil diyas are arranged in and around the house. Because of these flickering lamps, the festival has acquired its name : Dipawali or Diwali meaning 'a rows of lamps'. On this day, people buy something for the house or some jewelry for the women of the house. It is auspicious to be buy something metallic, such as silver.
Whatever may be the fables and legends behind the celebrations of Diwali, all people exchange sweets, wear new clothes and buy jewelry at this festive time. Card parties are held in many homes. Diwali has become commercialized as the biggest annual consumer spree because every family shops for sweets, gifts and fireworks. However, in all this frenzy of shopping and eating, the steady, burning lamp is a constant symbol of an illuminated mind.
The festival of Diwali is not only significant to Hindus, but, has importance in Jainism, Buddhism, and Sikhism. For Hindus, it is associated with the return of Lord Rama to Ayodhya, after his 14 years of exile and victory over the demon Ravana.
On that day, he was welcomed to the kingdom to Ayodhya with rows of Deep, lightened throughout the kingdom.
Thus, there is a tradition of lighting oil lamps that symbolize the victory of good over evil and freedom from spiritual darkness.
Hindus, also make preparations to welcome goddess Lakshmi by drawing rangoli, and footsteps (Paduka) On the entrance that would allure goddess Laksmi to visit one’s home and bring prosperity along with her.
Kali Choudas (काली चौदस), also known as ‘Narak Chaturdashi (नरक चतुर्दशी)’ or ‘Chhoti Diwali’ , is the second day of the Diwali Festival.
Kali means Dark (evil) and Chaudas - Fourteenth. Thus, celebrated 14th day of Ashwin, Kali Chaudas is the day allotted to the worship of Maha-Kali or Shakti and is believed that on this day Kali killed the wicked Raktavija. Also referred to as Narak-Chaturdashi, Kali Chaudas is day to abolish laziness and evil which create hell in our life and shine light on life. The strength to protect others is referred as Kali, and if its used for God's work it is called Mahakali.
Kali Chaudous is also attached to the legend of Lord Hanuman. Hanumanji as a baby was very hungry. Whilst lying down he saw the sun in the sky and thought it was a fruit and went to pick it. He flew into the sky and put the whole sun in his mouth causing darkness throughout the entire universe. Lord Indra requested that Hanumanji return the sun. When Hanumanji refused, Lord Indra unleashed his vajra and knocked Hanumanji down to earth releasing the Sun.
On this day we offer poojan to Hanumanji as our Kuldev to protect us from Evil. The poojan is performed with oil, flowers, chandan and sindur. Coconuts are also offered to Hanumanji and prashad of Sesame seed, ladoos and rice with ghee and sugar.
The rituals of Kali Choudas is strongly suggestive of the origin of Deepavaali as an harvest festival is performed. On this day delicacies are prepared from pounded semi-cooked rice (called Poha or Pova). This rice is taken from the fresh harvest available at that time. This custom is prevalent both in rural and urban areas especially in Western India.
On this day, a head wash and application of kajal in the eyes is believed to keep away the kali nazar (evil eye). Some say that those who are into tantra, learn their 'mantras' on this day. Alternatively, people offer Nived (food) to the goddess that is local to where they are originally from. This goddess is called their 'Kul Devi', in order to cast off evil spirits. Some families also offer food to their forefathers on this day. The second day of Diwali is known as Kali Choudas in Gujarat, Rajasthan & few part of Maharashtra. This reverence is called "Kali Chaudas or Kal Chaturdasi".
Kali means Dark (evil) and Chaudas - Fourteenth. Thus, celebrated 14th day of Ashwin, Kali Chaudas is the day allotted to the worship of Maha-Kali or Shakti and is believed that on this day Kali killed the wicked Raktavija. Also referred to as Narak-Chaturdashi, Kali Chaudas is day to abolish laziness and evil which create hell in our life and shine light on life. The strength to protect others is referred as Kali, and if its used for God's work it is called Mahakali.
Kali Chaudous is also attached to the legend of Lord Hanuman. Hanumanji as a baby was very hungry. Whilst lying down he saw the sun in the sky and thought it was a fruit and went to pick it. He flew into the sky and put the whole sun in his mouth causing darkness throughout the entire universe. Lord Indra requested that Hanumanji return the sun. When Hanumanji refused, Lord Indra unleashed his vajra and knocked Hanumanji down to earth releasing the Sun.
On this day we offer poojan to Hanumanji as our Kuldev to protect us from Evil. The poojan is performed with oil, flowers, chandan and sindur. Coconuts are also offered to Hanumanji and prashad of Sesame seed, ladoos and rice with ghee and sugar.
The rituals of Kali Choudas is strongly suggestive of the origin of Deepavaali as an harvest festival is performed. On this day delicacies are prepared from pounded semi-cooked rice (called Poha or Pova). This rice is taken from the fresh harvest available at that time. This custom is prevalent both in rural and urban areas especially in Western India.
On this day, a head wash and application of kajal in the eyes is believed to keep away the kali nazar (evil eye). Some say that those who are into tantra, learn their 'mantras' on this day. Alternatively, people offer Nived (food) to the goddess that is local to where they are originally from. This goddess is called their 'Kul Devi', in order to cast off evil spirits. Some families also offer food to their forefathers on this day. The second day of Diwali is known as Kali Choudas in Gujarat, Rajasthan & few part of Maharashtra. This reverence is called "Kali Chaudas or Kal Chaturdasi".
Diwali or Deepavali is popularly known as the festival of lights.It is an important five-day festival in Hinduism, Sikhism and Jainism. It is a Five-Day Festival. Today is the first day: Dhanteras. Dhanteras Festival, also known as Dhantrayodashi or Dhanwantari Triodasi, falls on the auspicious thirteenth lunar day of Krishna Paksha in the Hindu month of Kartik (October/November). In the word Dhanteras, "Dhan" stands for wealth. On Dhanteras Goddess Laxmi is worshiped to provide prosperity and well being. Hence Dhan Teras holds a lot more significance for the business community.
Legends:
A very interesting story about Dhanteras Festival says that once the sixteen year old son of King Hima. was doomed to die by a snake-bite on the fourth day of his marriage as per his horoscope. On that particular fourth day of his marriage his young wife did not allow him to sleep. She laid all the ornaments and lots of gold and silver
coins in a big heap at the entrance of her husband's boudoir and lighted innumerable lamps all over the place. And she went on telling stories and singing songs. When Yama, the god of Death arrived there in the guise of a Serpent his eyes got blinded by that dazzle of those brilliant lights and he could not enter the Prince's chamber. So he climbed on top of the heap of the ornaments and coins and sat there whole night listening to the melodious songs. In the morning he quietly went away. Thus the young wife saved her husband from the clutches of death. Since then this day of Dhanteras came to be known as the day of "Yamadeepdaan" and lamps are kept burning throughout the night in reverential adoration to Yam, the god of Death.
According to another popular legend, when the gods and demons churned the ocean for Amrit or nectar, Dhanavantri (the physician of the gods and an incarnation of Vishnu) emerged carrying a jar of the elixir on the day of Dhanteras.
Preparations:
To mark the auspicious day, houses and business premises are renovated and decorated. Entrances are made colorful with lovely traditional motifs of Rangoli designs to welcome the Goddess of Wealth and Prosperity. To indicate her long- awaited arrival, small footprints are drawn with rice flour and vermilion powder all over the houses. Lamps are kept burning all through the nights. Traditions:
On Dhanteras Hindus consider it auspicious to purchase gold or silver articles or at least one or two new utensils. It is believed that new “Dhan” or some form of precious metal is a sign of good luck. "Laxmi-Puja" is performed in the evenings when tiny Diyas of clay are lighted to drive away the shadows of evil spirits. "Bhajans"-devotional songs- in praise of Goddess Laxmi are also sung.Celebrations:
Dhanteras is celebrated with gusto and enthusiasm. "Lakshmi-Puja" is performed in the evenings when tiny diyas of clay are lighted to drive away the shadows of evil spirits. Bhajans ir devotional songs- in praise of Goddess Laxmi are sung and "Naivedya" of traditional sweets is offered to the Goddess. There is a peculiar custom in Maharashtra to lightly pound dry coriander seeds with jaggery and offer as Naivedya.In villages cattle are adorned and worshiped by farmers as they form the main source of their income. In south cows are offered special veneration as they are supposed to be the incarnation of Goddess Lakshmi and therefore they are adorned and worshiped on this day.
Once again we are back with the best of the demotivational Posters…
These posters are great, some of them are really funny but if a random image and a text is all it takes to get you going everyday, you might have serious problems. We’re not going to show you some cool motivational pics today because we’ve gathered a gallery with the funniest and probably the best demotivational posters. Enjoy!
Click HERE for the part 1…
These posters are great, some of them are really funny but if a random image and a text is all it takes to get you going everyday, you might have serious problems. We’re not going to show you some cool motivational pics today because we’ve gathered a gallery with the funniest and probably the best demotivational posters. Enjoy!
Click HERE for the part 1…
Good comic books can often times outshine the best book, song, film, or television program. The in-depth story details, accompanied by amazing illustrations give comics their own identity. Many influential characters have been born through comic strips, including a long list of famous superheroes. The first comic book appeared in the US in 1934. Despite their name, comic books are not necessarily only humorous. Many modern comic books tell stories in a variety of genres. In the US the super-hero genre dominates the market, although many other types of comics exist in Japan and various European nations, including the widely popular samurai series.
Celebrities just want to look good no matter what. But there are some situations they just don’t have any control over, like these in the photos. These are some of the most hilarious photo-bombs ever taken. You will fall-off your chair after seeing celebs’ photos ruined in such a funny way. Take a look.
These posters are great, some of them are really funny but if a random image and a text is all it takes to get you going everyday, you might have serious problems. We’re not going to show you some cool motivational pics today because we’ve gathered a gallery with the funniest and probably the best demotivational posters. Enjoy!
Click Here for Part-2
Click Here for Part-2
The WOW! signal
Wow, a secret message from outer space! Twenty years on and still no nearer an answer.
Wow, a secret message from outer space! Twenty years on and still no nearer an answer.
Hell yes, it’s time to do some drinkin’! You’re showered, dressed to the nines and you’ve got zero responsibilities before 2PM the next day. But before you start downing pints, it might be a good idea to get a little preview of what you’re alcoholic evening is going to look like. Here we’ve detailed the five stages of a drunken night, and needless to say, it doesn’t end pretty. But so what? You’re drunk!
Banta and and son went fishing one day. Sitting in the boat for a couple of hours gave them not much to do, so the son started thinking about the world around him. He began to get curious so he asked his father some questions.
“How does this boat float?”
Banta thought for a moment, then replied, “Don’t rightly know, son.”
The boy returned to his contemplation, but soon came up with another one, “How do fish breath underwater?”
Once again Banta replied, “Don’t rightly know, son.”
A little later the boy asked Banta, “Why is the sky blue?”
Again, Banta replied, “Don’t rightly know, son.”
Worried he was going to annoy his father, he said, “Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?”
Banta immediately assured him, “Of course not, son. If you don’t ask questions, you’ll never learn anything!”
“How does this boat float?”
Banta thought for a moment, then replied, “Don’t rightly know, son.”
The boy returned to his contemplation, but soon came up with another one, “How do fish breath underwater?”
Once again Banta replied, “Don’t rightly know, son.”
A little later the boy asked Banta, “Why is the sky blue?”
Again, Banta replied, “Don’t rightly know, son.”
Worried he was going to annoy his father, he said, “Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?”
Banta immediately assured him, “Of course not, son. If you don’t ask questions, you’ll never learn anything!”
These girls look so sexy… Just can not choose which are more beautiful and attractive, they which are drawn or the ones that are real.
Black Widow
Black Widow (Natalia “Natasha” Alianovna Romanova, also known as Natasha Romanoff) is a fictional character in the Marvel Comics Universe. Natasha Romanoff is featured in the 2010 motion picture Iron Man 2, where she is played by Scarlett Johansson.
I fear that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
A three is all that's good and right
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath a vicious square-root sign?
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick
With just some quick arithmetic
I know I'll never see the sun
As 1.7321
Such is my reality
A sad irrationality
When, hark, just what is this I see?
Google is amazing (please thank me for this amazing revelation). There are some things you probably didn’t know Google can do. Take your time and read the information below. You’ll likely learn a few tips and tricks that will make you appreciate Google even more.
10. Find a beautiful wallpaper for your desktop resolution with Google images
Here’s how you do it:
A Priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and to give a little speech at the dinner.
However, he was delayed, so the Priest decided to say his own few words while they waited:
'I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss's wife, taken illegal drugs, and sold his sister's jewelery to buy a gun. I was appalled.
But as the days went on I learned that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people.'....
Just as the Priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk:
'I'll never forget the first day our parish Priest arrived,' said the politician. 'In fact, I had the honour of being the first person to go to him for confession.'
Moral : Never, Never, Never Be Late....
However, he was delayed, so the Priest decided to say his own few words while they waited:
'I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss's wife, taken illegal drugs, and sold his sister's jewelery to buy a gun. I was appalled.
But as the days went on I learned that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people.'....
Just as the Priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk:
'I'll never forget the first day our parish Priest arrived,' said the politician. 'In fact, I had the honour of being the first person to go to him for confession.'
Moral : Never, Never, Never Be Late....
As the number of your Facebook friends and apps you (and them) are using increases, your Facebook news feed and wall can turn into one big mess. It’s nice to communicate with your friends, but if you can’t find useful posts amidst all those silly apps, or your real friends amongst all the unknown people you’ve befriended, it’s time to clean up your Facebook profile.
Facebook offers extensive options for fine tuning what individual applications and people can see or do on your Facebook profile, but if you haven’t been following all the changes (and Facebook likes to change often), you might feel lost in all the options. We’re offering a rundown of the most efficient ways to make more sense of your Facebook experience.
An Indian man was having a coffee and croissants with butter and jam in a cafe when an American tourist, chewing gum, sat down next to him.
The Indian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, 'You Indian folk eat the whole bread?'
The Indian frowned, annoyed with being bothered during his breakfast, and replied, 'of course.' The American blew a huge bubble. 'We don't. In the United States, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle them, transform them into croissants and sell them to India .' The American had a smirk on his face. The Indian listened in silence.
The American persisted, 'D'ya eat jam with your bread?' Sighing, the Indian replied, 'of course.' Cracking his gum between his teeth, the American said, 'we don't. In the United States, we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds and the leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell it to India...
The Indian then asked, 'Do you have sex in the United States?' The American smiled and said 'Why of course we do.' The Indian leaned closer to him and asked, 'And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?'
'We throw them away, of course!' Now it was the Indian's turn to smile.
'We don't. In India , we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to the United States...
The Indian politely ignored the American, who, nevertheless started up a conversation. The American snapped his gum and said, 'You Indian folk eat the whole bread?'
The Indian frowned, annoyed with being bothered during his breakfast, and replied, 'of course.' The American blew a huge bubble. 'We don't. In the United States, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle them, transform them into croissants and sell them to India .' The American had a smirk on his face. The Indian listened in silence.
The American persisted, 'D'ya eat jam with your bread?' Sighing, the Indian replied, 'of course.' Cracking his gum between his teeth, the American said, 'we don't. In the United States, we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds and the leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell it to India...
The Indian then asked, 'Do you have sex in the United States?' The American smiled and said 'Why of course we do.' The Indian leaned closer to him and asked, 'And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?'
'We throw them away, of course!' Now it was the Indian's turn to smile.
'We don't. In India , we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to the United States...
I wanted to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007 and 2008 and continuing it in 2009 also.......
Because of your kindness:
* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.
* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.
* Forwarded hundreds of mails but still waiting for FREE DESKTOP, LAPTOP, CAMERA, CELLPHONE etc…..
Because of your kindness:
* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.
* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.
* Forwarded hundreds of mails but still waiting for FREE DESKTOP, LAPTOP, CAMERA, CELLPHONE etc…..
Scientists at ISRO built a gun specifically to launch standard 2-kg dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.
NASA engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high-speed trains. Arrangements were made and a gun was sent to the NASA.
When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the "shatterproof" shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's backrest in two, and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin, like an arrow shot from a bow.
The horrified NASA engineers sent ISRO the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield and begged the ISRO scientists for suggestions.
ISRO responded with a one-line memo: Defrost the chicken...
NASA engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high-speed trains. Arrangements were made and a gun was sent to the NASA.
When the gun was fired, the engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the "shatterproof" shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's backrest in two, and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin, like an arrow shot from a bow.
The horrified NASA engineers sent ISRO the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield and begged the ISRO scientists for suggestions.
ISRO responded with a one-line memo: Defrost the chicken...
Bill's company made software to run a car.
Bill was taking a test ride of the car. Suddenly a truck came from opposite side.
Bill pressed ctrl+b to apply brakes.
A pop-up window appeared asking, "Are you sure you really want to stop?"
Before Bill could enter "Yes", there was a crash and the car caught fire.
In panic Bill forgot the password to open the door.
He started shouting "F1! F1!" but there was no computer professional present there to understand his screams.
Then he tried to come out through the car window-pane.
A message appeared on the screen, "An illegal function is performed.
All the window-panes of the car will be closed." Poor Bill died.
Messengers of death took away his soul and said to him, "You have never ever performed any good deeds in your life. You always stole the code from others. We are going to send you to hell."
Bill pleaded, "I am ready to go to hell but do provide me a computer, please."
Messengers of death smiled inwardly and permitted him a computer, but with no Alt, Ctrl and Delete keys on the keyboard.
[http://xtremeromil.blogspot.com/2010/03/new-car-operating-system.html]
Bill was taking a test ride of the car. Suddenly a truck came from opposite side.
Bill pressed ctrl+b to apply brakes.
A pop-up window appeared asking, "Are you sure you really want to stop?"
Before Bill could enter "Yes", there was a crash and the car caught fire.
In panic Bill forgot the password to open the door.
He started shouting "F1! F1!" but there was no computer professional present there to understand his screams.
Then he tried to come out through the car window-pane.
A message appeared on the screen, "An illegal function is performed.
All the window-panes of the car will be closed." Poor Bill died.
Messengers of death took away his soul and said to him, "You have never ever performed any good deeds in your life. You always stole the code from others. We are going to send you to hell."
Bill pleaded, "I am ready to go to hell but do provide me a computer, please."
Messengers of death smiled inwardly and permitted him a computer, but with no Alt, Ctrl and Delete keys on the keyboard.
[http://xtremeromil.blogspot.com/2010/03/new-car-operating-system.html]
Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for
Microsoft Europe.
5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Kantibhai
Patel.
Bill Gates: Thank you for coming. Those who do not know JAVA may leave.
2000 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to
lose
if I stay. I'll give it a try'
Bill Gates: Candidates who never had experience of managing more than
100 people may leave.
2000 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I
have nothing to lose if I stay.
What can happen to me?' So he stays.
Bill Gates: Candidates who do not have management diplomas may leave.
500 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to
lose?' So he stays in the room.
Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat (A language)
to leave.
498 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat
but what do I have to lose?'
So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate.
Everyone else has gone.
Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two
candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a
conversation together in that language.'
Calmly, Kantibhai turns to the other candidate and says 'kem chho'
The other candidate answers 'ek dam majama'!!!!
Microsoft Europe.
5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Kantibhai
Patel.
Bill Gates: Thank you for coming. Those who do not know JAVA may leave.
2000 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to
lose
if I stay. I'll give it a try'
Bill Gates: Candidates who never had experience of managing more than
100 people may leave.
2000 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I
have nothing to lose if I stay.
What can happen to me?' So he stays.
Bill Gates: Candidates who do not have management diplomas may leave.
500 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to
lose?' So he stays in the room.
Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat (A language)
to leave.
498 people leave the room.
Kantibhai says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat
but what do I have to lose?'
So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate.
Everyone else has gone.
Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two
candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a
conversation together in that language.'
Calmly, Kantibhai turns to the other candidate and says 'kem chho'
The other candidate answers 'ek dam majama'!!!!
An Indian politician went to the US to visit his counterpart. When the senator invited him home for dinner, the minister was very impressed by the lavish mansion, grounds and the costly furnishings.
He asked, "How can you afford all this on a meagre senator's salary?"
The sentaor smiled knowingly and took him to the window.
"Can you see the river?"
"Yes"
"Can you see the bridge over it?"
"Of course", said the minister.
"10 percent", said the senator smugly.
Some time later, he had occasion to pay a return visit. The Indian minister lavished all hospitality on him. When they came to his house,the American was stunned by the huge palace the minister had built, glittering with precious art, hundreds of servants etc etc.
"How can you possibly afford this, on a salary in Indian Rupees," he asked.
The minister called him to the window.
"See the river over there?"
"Sure", cried the senator.
"Can you see the bridge over it?"
The senator looked, was confused, peered closely and said, "No, I don't see any bridge."
"100 percent", said the minister !!!
He asked, "How can you afford all this on a meagre senator's salary?"
The sentaor smiled knowingly and took him to the window.
"Can you see the river?"
"Yes"
"Can you see the bridge over it?"
"Of course", said the minister.
"10 percent", said the senator smugly.
Some time later, he had occasion to pay a return visit. The Indian minister lavished all hospitality on him. When they came to his house,the American was stunned by the huge palace the minister had built, glittering with precious art, hundreds of servants etc etc.
"How can you possibly afford this, on a salary in Indian Rupees," he asked.
The minister called him to the window.
"See the river over there?"
"Sure", cried the senator.
"Can you see the bridge over it?"
The senator looked, was confused, peered closely and said, "No, I don't see any bridge."
"100 percent", said the minister !!!
Pichle saal ki baat hai..
There was a movie released called "GAVASKAR" in Australia...
Apna Sunil Gavaskar felt very proud about it.
He went personally to watch the movie and check out how his image was portrayed in the movie. The Movie started... Gavaskar patiently watched it till interval but found no clue of himself in it...
Then Gavaskar thought the main character sometimes make an entry after the interval but again to his disappointment, there was not even a single fact that he could relate himself to...
Gavaskar got wild and he decided to sue the movie producers & directors. He asked "U made the movie named Gavaskar but u haven't mentioned a single thing about me. Why did you do so??
Then he got a reply and after hearing that he got silent and came back home in India
......
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guess wht was the reply he got ???
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guess..
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"You people also made a superhit movie named BORDER. Do you by ay chance recall anything or any fact that was mentioned about ALLAN BORDER?
There was a movie released called "GAVASKAR" in Australia...
Apna Sunil Gavaskar felt very proud about it.
He went personally to watch the movie and check out how his image was portrayed in the movie. The Movie started... Gavaskar patiently watched it till interval but found no clue of himself in it...
Then Gavaskar thought the main character sometimes make an entry after the interval but again to his disappointment, there was not even a single fact that he could relate himself to...
Gavaskar got wild and he decided to sue the movie producers & directors. He asked "U made the movie named Gavaskar but u haven't mentioned a single thing about me. Why did you do so??
Then he got a reply and after hearing that he got silent and came back home in India
......
.....
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
guess wht was the reply he got ???
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
......
guess..
......
......
......
......
......
......
"You people also made a superhit movie named BORDER. Do you by ay chance recall anything or any fact that was mentioned about ALLAN BORDER?
Google announced Google Buzz, its new social sharing feature for Gmail, company representatives admitted Buzz was inspired by a similar product: Google Wave. In fact, some of the features of Buzz and Wave are so similar you might be wondering why there are two different products in the first place?
Both services are supposed to help you create conversations and give you a richer experience around Web-based media like videos, images ,and regular text. But while Buzz and Wave have a lot in common, there also some key differences that set each service apart.
Wave and Buzz? What the heck are you talking about?
Google describes Wave as “an online tool for real-time communication and collaboration. A wave can be both a conversation and a document where people can discuss and work together using richly formatted text, photos, videos, maps, and more.” Basically, Google Wave is e-mail, instant messaging, an online collaboration tool and a wiki all rolled into one service.
But Google Buzz is designed solely to let you share videos, photos, links, and status updates with others just like you would on Facebook or Twitter. You can access Buzz through your Gmail inbox or through your mobile device’s Web browser.
Real-time communication versus e-mail conversation
While you will receive Buzz updates very quickly via e-mail, communication in Google Wave is much faster. Unlike Buzz, communication in Wave happens in real time, and you can actually watch someone typing out their response or comment on an individual wave. That’s a big difference, since it allows Wave users to easily collaborate on a project.
Wave is about collaboration, Buzz is about conversation
Wave was built on collaborative features like editing a document, planning an event, creating meeting notes, and so on. But if you just want to share photos, videos, or comments that don’t require real-time communication, then Google Buzz is probably the better option.
Waving is complex, Buzzing not so much
One of the problems with Wave is that it’s a difficult tool to explain to others, and once you understand what Wave is it’s even harder to understand everything you can do with it. Buzz, on the other hand, works similarly to e-mail and is focused on one thing: sharing content with others.
Buzz is a gateway to Wave
In a lot of ways, Buzz is a halfway point between regular e-mail and Wave. For example, when you get an updated Buzz in your inbox or Buzz tab, it displays the various comments and media that have been shared as a list. As the Buzz develops, that list gets updated and edited, but you only ever have one copy of an individual Buzz in your inbox.
Similarly, in Wave you only ever see one copy of an active wave, making it easier to track changes to a document or conversation. But new e-mail messages pile on top of one another, and it doesn’t take long before you end up with these massive conversation strings that are constantly being replicated every time you hit the reply button.
So my guess, as well as the guess of others, is that once you’re comfortable with Buzz, you might be more willing to use Wave for collaborative online projects. But the trick will be to get you to buy into using Google Buzz, and that may be a tough sell if you’re already used to sharing items with your existing networks on Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter.
Want to follow me on Buzz! Add me to your gmail buddy list: romilmars@gmail.com
Want a Google wave invite??? Mail me using your Google account...
Both services are supposed to help you create conversations and give you a richer experience around Web-based media like videos, images ,and regular text. But while Buzz and Wave have a lot in common, there also some key differences that set each service apart.
Wave and Buzz? What the heck are you talking about?
Google describes Wave as “an online tool for real-time communication and collaboration. A wave can be both a conversation and a document where people can discuss and work together using richly formatted text, photos, videos, maps, and more.” Basically, Google Wave is e-mail, instant messaging, an online collaboration tool and a wiki all rolled into one service.
But Google Buzz is designed solely to let you share videos, photos, links, and status updates with others just like you would on Facebook or Twitter. You can access Buzz through your Gmail inbox or through your mobile device’s Web browser.
Real-time communication versus e-mail conversation
While you will receive Buzz updates very quickly via e-mail, communication in Google Wave is much faster. Unlike Buzz, communication in Wave happens in real time, and you can actually watch someone typing out their response or comment on an individual wave. That’s a big difference, since it allows Wave users to easily collaborate on a project.
Wave is about collaboration, Buzz is about conversation
Wave was built on collaborative features like editing a document, planning an event, creating meeting notes, and so on. But if you just want to share photos, videos, or comments that don’t require real-time communication, then Google Buzz is probably the better option.
Waving is complex, Buzzing not so much
One of the problems with Wave is that it’s a difficult tool to explain to others, and once you understand what Wave is it’s even harder to understand everything you can do with it. Buzz, on the other hand, works similarly to e-mail and is focused on one thing: sharing content with others.
Buzz is a gateway to Wave
In a lot of ways, Buzz is a halfway point between regular e-mail and Wave. For example, when you get an updated Buzz in your inbox or Buzz tab, it displays the various comments and media that have been shared as a list. As the Buzz develops, that list gets updated and edited, but you only ever have one copy of an individual Buzz in your inbox.
Similarly, in Wave you only ever see one copy of an active wave, making it easier to track changes to a document or conversation. But new e-mail messages pile on top of one another, and it doesn’t take long before you end up with these massive conversation strings that are constantly being replicated every time you hit the reply button.
So my guess, as well as the guess of others, is that once you’re comfortable with Buzz, you might be more willing to use Wave for collaborative online projects. But the trick will be to get you to buy into using Google Buzz, and that may be a tough sell if you’re already used to sharing items with your existing networks on Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter.
Want to follow me on Buzz! Add me to your gmail buddy list: romilmars@gmail.com
Want a Google wave invite??? Mail me using your Google account...
John Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN) for 6 a.m.
While his coffeepot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN PHILIPPINES) .
He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN
VIETNAM). After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA), then he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today.
After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA), he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY) filled it with GAS (from Saudi Arabia) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB.
At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day checking his computer (MADE IN MALAYSIA), John decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV (MADE IN KOREA), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in AMERICA.
AND NOW HE'S HOPING HE CAN GET HELP FROM HIS PRESIDENT (MADE IN KENYA)
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer
building its house and
laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fool and laughs &
dances & plays the
summer away.
Come winter, the Ant is warm and well fed. The Grasshopper
has no food or
shelter so he dies out in the cold.
*Indian Version:**
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer
building its house and
laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant's a fool and laughs
& dances & plays the
summer away.
Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press
conference and
demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm
and well fed while
others are cold and starving.
NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering
Grasshopper next
to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table
filled with food.
The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be
that this poor
Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the
Ant's house.*
Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers
demanding that
Grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.
Mayawati states this as `injustice' done on Minorities.
Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian
Government for
not upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.
The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking
support to the
Grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace
for prompt support
as against the wrath of God for non-compliance) .
Opposition MPs stage a walkout. Left parties call for
'Bengal Bandh' in West
Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.
CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from
working hard in
the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among
Ants and
Grasshoppers.
Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all
Indian Railway
Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.
Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the ' Prevention
of Terrorism Against
Grasshoppers Act' [POTAGA], with effect from the
beginning of the winter.
Arjun Singh makes 'Special Reservation ' for
Grasshoppers in Educational
Institutions & in Government Services.
The Ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and
having nothing left
to pay his retroactive taxes, it's home is confiscated
by the Government and
handed over to the Grasshopper in a ceremony covered by
NDTV.
Arundhati Roy calls it 'A Triumph of Justice'.
Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice '.
CPM calls it the ' Revolutionary Resurgence of the
Downtrodden '
Koffi Annan invites the Grasshopper to address the UN
General Assembly. **
Many years later....**
The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a
multi-billion dollar
company in Silicon Valley, 100s of Grasshoppers still die
of starvation
despite reservation somewhere in India ,
AND
As a result of loosing lot of hard working Ants and feeding
the grasshoppers,
India is still a developing country.
building its house and
laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fool and laughs &
dances & plays the
summer away.
Come winter, the Ant is warm and well fed. The Grasshopper
has no food or
shelter so he dies out in the cold.
*Indian Version:**
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer
building its house and
laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant's a fool and laughs
& dances & plays the
summer away.
Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press
conference and
demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm
and well fed while
others are cold and starving.
NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering
Grasshopper next
to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table
filled with food.
The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be
that this poor
Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the
Ant's house.*
Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers
demanding that
Grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.
Mayawati states this as `injustice' done on Minorities.
Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian
Government for
not upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.
The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking
support to the
Grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace
for prompt support
as against the wrath of God for non-compliance) .
Opposition MPs stage a walkout. Left parties call for
'Bengal Bandh' in West
Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.
CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from
working hard in
the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among
Ants and
Grasshoppers.
Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all
Indian Railway
Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.
Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the ' Prevention
of Terrorism Against
Grasshoppers Act' [POTAGA], with effect from the
beginning of the winter.
Arjun Singh makes 'Special Reservation ' for
Grasshoppers in Educational
Institutions & in Government Services.
The Ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and
having nothing left
to pay his retroactive taxes, it's home is confiscated
by the Government and
handed over to the Grasshopper in a ceremony covered by
NDTV.
Arundhati Roy calls it 'A Triumph of Justice'.
Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice '.
CPM calls it the ' Revolutionary Resurgence of the
Downtrodden '
Koffi Annan invites the Grasshopper to address the UN
General Assembly. **
Many years later....**
The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a
multi-billion dollar
company in Silicon Valley, 100s of Grasshoppers still die
of starvation
despite reservation somewhere in India ,
AND
As a result of loosing lot of hard working Ants and feeding
the grasshoppers,
India is still a developing country.
Once there was a bus conductor, who was very rude to his passengers.
One day a beautiful young girl, of around 18 years,tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus. Unfortunately the beautiful young girl came
under the bus and died on the spot.
Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station, who in turn took him to the court.
The judge was not at all impressed with him and gave him capital punishment.
He was taken to the electrocution chamber.
There was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the room.
The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him! .
But to everyone's amazement, he survived.
The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his profession. After a few months, this time, a good looking middle aged woman tried
to board the bus but the conductor didn't stop the bus.
Unfortunately, this time also, the good looking middle aged woman came under the bus and died on the spot. Again angry passengers took him to the
police station, who in turn took him to the court.
The judge took one look at the conductor and gave him capital punishment.
The Bus conductor was taken to the same electrocution chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana peel
at one corner of the room.
He was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him.
This time also to everyone's amazement, he survived.
The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his profession. A couple of months later, an elderly gentleman tried to board the bus.
This time the Bus conductor, remembering his earlier experiences, stopped the bus.
Unfortunately the elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his injuries.
The conductor was taken to the police station and then to the court, to the same judge.
Though he hadn't done anything wrong, but considering his past record the judge decided to set an example and gave him capital punishment.
The Bus conductor was again taken to the same electrocution chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana
peel at one corner of the room.
He was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him.
This time he died instantly !!!!!!!!!!!
The question is why didn't he die on the first two occasions, but died instantly the third time??
Try to solve it yourselves. This is rather interesting and answer is perfectly logical.
If necessary read the puzzle once again.
Still you couldn't,! Then see below.........
Think hard
Tired....
wanna know the answer????
Answer :
During the first two times, the conductor was a Bad Conductor, therefore electricity didn't pass through him.
But during the third time, he was a good conductor, electricity passed through him freely and he died!
Ha Ha Ha ha !!!!!!!! Obviously you gotta revise your science chapter on Electricity ??
One day a beautiful young girl, of around 18 years,tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus. Unfortunately the beautiful young girl came
under the bus and died on the spot.
Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station, who in turn took him to the court.
The judge was not at all impressed with him and gave him capital punishment.
He was taken to the electrocution chamber.
There was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the room.
The conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him! .
But to everyone's amazement, he survived.
The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his profession. After a few months, this time, a good looking middle aged woman tried
to board the bus but the conductor didn't stop the bus.
Unfortunately, this time also, the good looking middle aged woman came under the bus and died on the spot. Again angry passengers took him to the
police station, who in turn took him to the court.
The judge took one look at the conductor and gave him capital punishment.
The Bus conductor was taken to the same electrocution chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana peel
at one corner of the room.
He was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him.
This time also to everyone's amazement, he survived.
The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his profession. A couple of months later, an elderly gentleman tried to board the bus.
This time the Bus conductor, remembering his earlier experiences, stopped the bus.
Unfortunately the elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his injuries.
The conductor was taken to the police station and then to the court, to the same judge.
Though he hadn't done anything wrong, but considering his past record the judge decided to set an example and gave him capital punishment.
The Bus conductor was again taken to the same electrocution chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and a single banana
peel at one corner of the room.
He was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him.
This time he died instantly !!!!!!!!!!!
The question is why didn't he die on the first two occasions, but died instantly the third time??
Try to solve it yourselves. This is rather interesting and answer is perfectly logical.
If necessary read the puzzle once again.
Still you couldn't,! Then see below.........
Think hard
Tired....
wanna know the answer????
Answer :
During the first two times, the conductor was a Bad Conductor, therefore electricity didn't pass through him.
But during the third time, he was a good conductor, electricity passed through him freely and he died!
Ha Ha Ha ha !!!!!!!! Obviously you gotta revise your science chapter on Electricity ??
Another year passed out and now we are in 2010!!!
The year 2009 gave a lot of super hit movies to the Hollywood...
So, here I present the Top 10 movies of 2009 according to me...
If you are searching for the movies for 2008 click here!!!
So Here We Are...
The year 2009 gave a lot of super hit movies to the Hollywood...
So, here I present the Top 10 movies of 2009 according to me...
If you are searching for the movies for 2008 click here!!!
So Here We Are...
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